Thankfully out of the 170 tweenagers on the Diocesan Middle School Youth Rally, only 9 of them were my responsibility. And even better they were 9 who probably could have done good without me there, they were relatively easy. It was the other 161 youth there that drove me nuts. Well, I guess just a little farther nuts than I already am.
You see, the other youth ministers and chaperones seemed to have little or no control over some, or most of their youth. Granted, the two young men who came with our group went a little nuts at the dance, and when their door closed for the night, and our girls got a little restless on the excessive down time, but I think that is expected and it is easily fixed. These other kids were running (literally and figuratively) wild throughout the rally sessions, their off time, Mass and the hallways all night long.
The behavior from the youth is expected. They were just doing what kids do when they are allowed to do it. A lot of this could have been stopped if one of the chaperones from the group they came with would have disciplined them a little. Yet none of that discipline came. The kids ran free and embarrassed themselves, their families, their parish and the larger Catholic Church. I will probably never look at the youth ministers and staffs from those parishes the same again, and I am sure I am not the only one.
For me anyway, lovingly disciplining a child helps to mold them into responsible and engaged young adults and adults. I am sure you are sitting there wondering why I didn't step up and correct the behavior I saw as embarrassing. The thing is I did, and when I did the child would run to one of their chaperones and tell them what had happened. For me, no problem the person, by correcting the behavior, not only saved me the time of doing it but also gave me the chance to teach about discipline and discipleship (curious how they share the same root). Yet for these other youth ministers and parents I, by correcting the 4:00 am tag in the halls, the 3:30 am blind room calls, text messaging during prayer and downright disrespectful behavior going on during mass, was being a kill joy.
Yes, the Church is supposed to be a loving and open place for all, yet that does not mean that we have to tolerate behavior that is disrespectful to our beliefs. That also does not mean that we have to tolerate behavior that is disrespectful of others and their time in the name of tolerance and openness. Christ is a very loving and forgiving God, but He is not tolerant. In the Gospels those who came into contact with Him left changed. Their behavior, their attitude and their lives were changed when they came into contact with Him. They became more disciplined for the most part as well.
I guess the point underneath these ramblings is that as followers of Christ we should strive to be like Him in all aspects of our lives. We should attempt to be like Christ in our capacity as parents, teachers and youth ministers. This even includes lovingly disciplining those who Christ chooses to allow us to shepherd, even if it is like herding cats.
Prayers,
Pisio
1 comment:
Good Job, sometimes being a "kill Joy" can turn into a meaningful teaching moment. Some times certain situations from the past pop into my mind and I wish I had taken a moment here or there to more clearly and firmly lead some of the teens closer to Christ. Whether they appear disinterested on the surface or not, the fact that they are there indicates a hunger and desire for His truth.
Keep up the good work
God Bless Rod
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