Parenting

Teenagers, God's little reminder of what it is like to have someone made in your image who denies your existence and does not want to talk to you...

I heard that and I almost choked. It is so true. And you know what? In my humble opinion it is the parent's fault that their kids turn into such little shitheads. I see it all the time, and one thing holds true 96% of the time... The closer your relationship to God is as a parent, the better your kids are going to turn out.

I see it all the time... there are parents out there who literally abuse their kids and get away with it. This is not a physical abuse in the traditional sense, and most people will never recognize it. Parents keep their kids so busy that they do not even have time to sit and eat together once a day. They spend their time running their kids from one event to another never allowing their kids to breath... or rest for that matter. It is abuse... physical, psychological, emotional and spiritual.

Generally the type of parents described above have kids that turn out to be total shitheads. They are not bad kids, they just direct their anger at everyone and anyone who is not their peer. Any adult authority figure is ridiculed and disrespected. Anything that their parents want them to do is looked at as a burden, and they lash out at everything... Their kids may succeed socially and financially, but they are spiritually bankrupt. It is really sad how their parents have screwed them up so bad.

Then their are the parents who pray together with their kids... and well... act like parents. They set realistic boundaries and limits on what their kids can do. They do not allow the child to quit half way through something... You sign up for it, you finish it. They support their kids, and want them then to succeed, but they also know their roles as parents.

Recently I was told by a parent of a teen in the Confirmation program I run that one day I would understand how Church would not be a priority.... Well... I wanted to vomit, and had to hold it back, and I wanted to slap her. How can you make Christianity and enhancement to your life, and not your way of life? Modern Christians have screwed up what it means to be Christian, and the Faith is now a lifestyle enhancement, not a lifestyle. God has become a big candy dispenser in the sky.

Oh well... I can call them out on things all that I want, but the fact is the choice is up to them. As long as I know that I am being faithful to what He is calling me to, I have nothing else to worry about. I pray that I will not be one of the parents that screws their kids up so badly that God is an enhancement... I also resent someone saying that I will understand allowing their faith life and spiritual growth to take a back seat to soccer, or volleyball or any other social event. Christianity is a lifestyle, not a social club...

Prayers,

Pisio

Ministry with Teens

I have never known anything as rewarding as the work that I do with teenagers. I am thankful that Lord has blessed me with the opportunity to pass on the Faith to the coming generation. I have to tell you though it is the most taxing career choice I think that I could have made. I love what I do, but man am I tired...

Tonight I had a night with my peer ministry where we played a game called Curses. I am convinced that this is a game straight from hell, so it is perfect to play at a Church meeting. Actually, it is a lot of fun, and allows you opportunity to break down the walls that keep you from opening up in groups. It also allows me to see the strengths and weaknesses of the teenagers that I look to as leaders. 

Being an introvert, I have to be alone at times to recharge... so to speak. Tonight is one of those nights where I am glad that I married Jonah. She understands that sometimes I just need my space. We are able to be in the same room together and know that we are supporting each other, yet not in each other's space. Does that even make any sense?

So... In  three weeks we have our Mystery Dinner Theater Fundraiser, the following weekend is a Junior High Retreat, then we have Easter and three weeks later our Confirmation Retreat. It all ends on May 2nd after the Celebration of the Rite of Confirmation. Or does it just begin? That is really the question... 

I am one of the few youth ministers in the Diocese who chooses to do a round the year ministry. It is really silly to me to take the summers off, as that is when those we minister to have the most free time, yet most of my counterparts here in the Diocese do just that. I just do not see how they can ever make inroads in to the teenage culture. That is something that in my experience takes around the calendar consistency and quality.

Time will tell I guess...

Any way... It is going to be a busy few months. I pray that He will give me the strength to make it through these busy times... and that my wife knows despite my desire to be alone... how much I love her...

Happy SAINT Valentine's Day

Prayers,

Pisio

Life

No, not mine... I mean in general. I don't know why, but today I am thinking about life a lot. Perhaps it was Fr. John's Ash Wednesday reflection that started it all... I guess it probably was... Great! I get to blame my boss for this one...

Abortion, to me, is the biggest abuse against life in general in the US today. Believe it or not, a Pope called it in an amazing letter to the Christian Church that I think more people today should read. He predicted (prophesied?) that the wide spread acceptance of birth control would lead to the moral decay of our society... It appears that Pope Paul VI was correct... The issues he brings up and discusses are rants in and of themselves for me, so today I will stick with one side of the life issue... abortion.

I cringe every time I hear an infant in the womb called a fetus. It is dehumanizing to the little defenseless one growing in the womb. The argument I hear is that you can not dehumanize something that is not yet human (yeah okay... I guess you are carrying a toad, or perhaps a Chihuahua). But I think the deeper issue is the question of when life begins. As a Catholic, I believe that life begins at the moment of conception. From the time the sperm and the egg unite and cell division begins that is life. In the case of a man and woman conceiving, this must be human life. So, as a Catholic I believe that life begins at conception (redundant, but with enough repetition it may get through to some).

The definition of life beginning at conception is fine for me, but some argue that a baby is not truly alive until it can live on its own outside the womb. Fine... I disagree, but I have heard the arguments and while I disagree I can at least see where you are coming from. Yet can a week old baby live on its own outside the womb? No, it needs constant care... so I guess that baby is not alive... What about my 4 year old nephew? Can he live on his own outside the womb? No he can't. What about Shaun, the 22 year old downs syndrome man I used to take care of... Are you seeing how absurd that argument is yet? I mean at the end of his life, my grandfather (nearly 85) couldn't live without constant care of a nurse... was he not alive?

I think a step in right direction in this argument would be to define life as the opposite of death.  Makes sense, since that is pretty much what life is... something that is not dead. Well, the medical community recognizes death as the absence of brain waves. It logically follows then that anything with brain waves is alive. This would mean that at about 6 weeks the fertilized human should be considered to be alive. If after six weeks you were to abort your pregnancy, you would be killing a human... premeditated murder in most cases. 

I hate to criminalize the behavior of a potentially traumatized woman. I understand that there is a lot of emotion and confusion in some cases... in others the woman is just plainly misled, or pressured into it by supposed friends, families or lovers. But in all honesty, what harm can come from allowing another life into this world? In some cases, choosing not to terminate your child may actually be beneficial to your health. You never know what God intends to do with the situations we back ourselves into. 

The question then turns to those that may be the victim of rape or incest. What do we do with their unwanted pregnancy? I can honestly tell you I just do not know. I would never advise my wife to abort a pregnancy... even that of another man who raped her. While the memory may be painful, the life that was created was created for a reason. If God can take the Crucifixion and make good come from it, then no matter what happens to me in this life, if I turn and give it to God, can be turned into good. 

I guess underneath it all I can not see how a created life can not be a thing of joy. This is coming from someone who is not rich at all, and can not afford to feed his family without the help of a wife who works full time. Would be apprehensive or worried about making ends meet if God blessed us with another mouth to feed? Yes... Would we ever terminate that life because we would not be as comfortable as we would like to be? No... After all, as a Christian, the Crucifix is the symbol of our faith, and honestly that does not look too comfortable to me...

As a former fetus... I oppose abortion...

Prayers,

Pisio